Flaming Island

So why are there so many gays on Fire Island? And further more, why are the gays on Fire Island gayer than other gays?
I spent the Fourth of July on Fire Island this year. As soon as the ferry docks at Cherry Grove there is a large gay pride flag waving in the wind for all to see. If your a homosexual man and you're not wearing eight inch heels and a blond wig you are severely out of place. Add a pair of ass-less chaps and your finally dressed for the occasion.
Clubs such as the Cherry's and Ice Palace are lovely clubs to listen to techno and house music while watching some heavy girl on girl action. Don't be the only straight couple on the island because you don't want to be boo'd by the lesbians and drags.
Right outside of the Ice Palace is a quaint little pizza shop where the waitresses are like a ray of sunshine. There's an elderly woman who greets you with a "make up your mind already" and when you ask for straws or napkins she replies with "wow you just want everything." Then after that amazing service and paying $3.50 for a regular slice of pizza, be prepared to tip or else this troll lady will chase you down to a liquor store to explain how she 'bent over backwards' to help everyone.
Be careful when you walk down the sidewalks alone, because there are summer houses that are just oozing with gay orgy's!! And random gays have no shame with just pulling you into their naked shack of sex!
So how did Fire Island become a breeding ground for gays? Did they all decide to move there together? Was the island created for gays? Did gay people decide that because it was called Fire Island that it would be the place to go if you're a homo? And even more confusing to me is why do these gay people act fifty times more flamboyant than gay people anywhere else?
How many licks does it take to get to the secret of Fire Island? The world may not want to know.

-B.S.