It's coming.....

We all dread it…it happens to all of us…one minute we’re in a casual dating situation and having fun…with the new conversations, dates, friends, sex… but the longer the relationship goes on for, the more serious it is bound to get…you can’t help it, it just happens…one day you are just rolling around the sack with your “boyfriend” and the next thing you know BAMMMM it’s time to meet the parents. Literally.
Once when I was at my boyfriends house (who used to live in the basement of his parents house) I woke up alone in his bed to his father telling me I had to move because renovators were coming in the basement. I’m just glad I happened to be wearing clothes that night.
But forget about how awkward that meeting was, I want to think about how awkward it is for the other person. Like how awkward is it for you when you’re introducing your significant other to your parents? Wondering is that a fake smile my dad has or a genuine smile? Is my grandfather offering him a drink because he wants to drink together or because he wants to see if he’s going to drink and drive? Does your aunt really thing his profession is noble, or is she just waiting for him to turn around to tell you how he will never make a decent living in the market? Those are all the questions that went through my mind yesterday at my sister’s Christening. Because letting him meet my parents and grandparents was one huge step already, but meeting the entire Curtiss Clan was overwhelming…not only for him but for me.

I was constantly worrying about how everything we did would look to my family, I didn’t want to be too touchy feely because I didn’t want them to know we were having sex. But I didn’t want to not touch at all because I didn’t want people to think we had a bad relationship or were in a fight. I didn’t want to give him a tour of the house because I didn’t want people to think we sneaking off to be alone together. I didn’t want him to go to his car because I didn’t want my family to know that he’s a smoker (and I didn’t want him to smoke a cigarette without me.) I didn’t even want to leave with him because I didn’t want everyone knowing I was going back to his house for the night.

All of my worries were put to rest. My grandfather offered him a beer minutes after he walked through the door and talked to him for hours, not grilling him, but having legitimate conversations about politics and the economy. (This is probably the first boyfriend I’ve ever had that could hold an intelligent conversation with my family) My father came over to where we were sitting and said, “I wanted to let you know that I like you, we all like you, and we’re glad that you can make Erica happy. If your work schedule permitted it would you want to come to Puerto Rico for the week of August 15 with us? Tickets are no problem.”
WTF??? I’ve been dating this guy for a few months and my dad’s offering him free trips out of the country? He has never invited my best friends on a trip with us!
If that wasn’t weird enough, I go to the bathroom for a minute and I’m rushing because I don’t want to leave him alone with my family and let them tear him apart…I return to see my boyfriend, grandfather and cousin taking shots together. My grandfather never offers me a drink!
Then my god mother who I respect so much and truly value her opinion told me she thought she was cute and that he had a good steady job and she’s happy for me. My grandmother told me he’s the first guy she ever thought was good enough for me.

After the christening I stopped at my mom’s place. My mom was going to be a little more difficult to accept Mike (even though she has already met him and confirmed that she liked him) because she didn’t have the best impressions of him. When she first met him after dropping me at his house he was high (I doubt she knew though) the second time she met him at a cancer benefit my sorority held on campus he had been drinking before (she smelt the liquor on him immediately) and every fight we have ever had I told my mom every detail about, so she’s a little bias. But last night the two of them bonded over embarrassing photos of my childhood and a friendly rivalry over the Heat vs. Mavericks play off basketball game.

Maybe the dreaded meeting the parents isn’t the huge ordeal we build it up to be in our heads. As much as we hate to hear it parents were our age once, and as much as I hate to admit it, they’re not all clueless. Well at least mine aren’t. Sucks to not be me!